More Praise for Stane Sladen -Slater- Andrew Harrell

Posted: November 9, 2010 in Humor
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More Praise for Stane Sladen-Slater

Excerpts from a new collection of notable critical notices on the work of American author Stane Sladen-Slater.

ORANGE, fiction, 1989

“This book is tops in the field of short story collections based on fruit. With a mixture of excitement for literature and sadness for ourselves, we should all look forward to seeing Stane Sladen-Slater, (a former benchwarmer for the Toronto Maple Leaves and, until last year, a High School gym teacher,) progress as a writer as he steps out of the confines of a 98-page work that never uses the letter ‘a.’”

– Logan Hemmish, The Globe

“A really cool collection of stories and stuff. Yeah. Seriously, I read all of them, and they were really cool. I liked them. I promise I read them, they were, um, they were about like, ideas for a cartoon show or something. With fruit, yeah, of course. It was like a Saturday morning cartoon show, you know? Well, no, I guess kids wouldn’t really be allowed to see that stuff. Anyway it was really pretty cool. I think the guy’s name was, uh, Steven Sladen-Satin or something.”

– Moe Reid, student

“I read it. I thought it was awkward.”

– Tamara Pindle, Henry Pierce’s girlfriend

“By now, everyone who pays attention to contemporary literature at all, has heard about author Stane Sladen-Slater and his new collection of fruit-obsessed murder scenes. But, many pieces of commentary have been curiously absent in pointing out the homoerotic undertones of the book as a whole.”

– Daniel T. Mannis, author

THE WATER FOUNTAIN, fiction, 1992

“Dazzles and crackles with the author’s energy and passion. Story isn’t what’s important here. Instead, it’s the way the story is presented with such style. In the deep recesses of your mind, you can almost hear the ‘tick-tack’ of Sladen-Slater pounding away at his keyboard. It’s rather annoying.”

– Logan Hemmish, The Globe

“A beautifully packaged book. Eye-grabbing cover and pages that are luxuriously soft to the touch.”

– Moe Reid, student

“The standout section of The Water Fountain is, of course, the penultimate chapter, devoted to the main character Carmen, in labor, and later giving birth to a paperback book, which is tragically missing its last page. Otherwise, the main narrative is a limp, sorry excuse for a story and will remind readers of a drunken dinner toast that is going on for far too long.”

– Mina Croatoa, New York Moment

“Sladen-Slater has the ability to tell quiet, pensive, personal stories in a way that makes them sound like the roar of an angry lioness. His writing, however, possesses none of the same qualities. The Water Fountain reads more like a leaky faucet you spend a few hours trying to fix one Saturday and then give up on.”

– Glenda Thom, Literary Equivalent

THE LEGEND OF LOG, fiction, 1994

“This book fell apart as I reached the end of it, literally. I have not since purchased a new copy, but based on what I’ve read so far it seems to be well-written and leading up to something exciting.”

– Moe Reid, student

“An okay book. Especially good in some parts, but not that great in others.”

– Steven Hau, Literature and Wart Removal

“Handsomely presented. For its price, not the worst thing you could buy from a local bookstore.”

– Glenda Thom, Literary Equivalent

BEAR BEAR BEAR BEAR, fiction, 1998

“After weeks and weeks, or however long it takes to read a book, it becomes evident that Stane’s work relies too heavily on the crutch of the English language, making it a boring novel, in my opinion.”

– Moe Reid, student

“Stupid.”

– Tamara Pindle, Henry Pierce’s ex-girlfriend

“Unreadable.”

– Mina Croatoa, New York Times

“Sladen-Slater’s latest novel fails because it refuses to make use of the literary techniques that made the author successful in the first place: plot, dialogue, subject/verb agreement…”

– Steven How (formerly Steven Hau), Wart Removal and Literature (formerly Literature and Wart Removal)

“Sensational. Educational. The best book I’ve ever read. The title chapters alone could shift the state of the American cell phone market for decades to come.”

– Logan Hemmish, The Globe

MY NEIGHBORHOOD, THE NUCLEAR POWER PLANT AND MY FAMILY, autobiographical, 2003

“Every word of it, as far as I know, is true. And that’s all I’ll say about it.”

– Henry Pierce, rival author

“Oddly vengeful in the parts introducing us to Sladen-Slater’s childhood world, but most of all colored by a subtle homoerotic obsession.”

– Daniel T. Mannis, author

CONGRATULATIONS, fiction, 2008

“Boring.”

– Tamara Sladen-Slater, widow

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